Malibu

I've been a Hole fan for a very long time now, and whatever you have or haven't got against Courtney Love (which, may be quite a lot if you're a Nirvana fan) many don't even give her the chance and listen to her band Hole, whose debut album was way back in 1991 (Pretty On The Inside, anyone?).

Now, yes, I'm a fan now, but it's quite likely, as with any band you listen to in your mid-teenage years, I may detest them in a few years; dis-consider them because they were something I listened to when I was infatuated, angry, emotional and all very storming riot-grrrl in your face. Saying this, I will always love the simple music, the most simply-massed chorus lines, the melodies that are easy and perfect for gigs, with hardly any triviality in them. Some of Hole early music was melodic noise: distorted, pure and kind of cataclysmic. In the simplest terms, this got a hell of a lot easier when she met Kurt Cobain, and we can possible consider him to be an influence on her songwriting skills. I worship this woman, and I'm pretty fond of Kurt too, but they definitely helped each other out musically, a kind of mutual relationship. You only have to listen to Live Through This, which released only a few days after Kurt Cobain's suicide in April 1994 sounds a bit like a prophecy, a cry for help and it's painfully ironic. But it also elements what Love does best: anger; sweetness; bold sweeping antics and choruses; lust but a lot of love too. You've just got to listen to Doll Parts, which will forever remain my unrequited love anthem of teenager-dom. 

But Celebrity Skin? Celebrity Skin was glamour, revolution, a new start and a completely new world of Hollywood, glitz and glam for Courtney Love. She was going out with Edward Norton, attending the Oscars, getting down on a knowing basis with superstars like Elton John and Kate Moss.

But there was still some 1994 in her and that album. 'Malibu', my favourite song from this album will forever also be my favourite Hole song. It's painful, exquisite, delightful, regretful but once again, full of love and gratitude and everything that Courtney Love encompasses. You have to listen to it over a multitude of summers to understand it, but this song is summer through and through, and not even specifically the season either. 

I have the 7'' single of this framed on my wall at home, and every time things get tough, I gaze over to it, listen to the track and remind myself that through it all, one day, I will be residing in Malibu with Courtney Love too. Physically, I'll be there and it's the conclusion of my travels post-degree, but of course, emotionally too... always. 

I can't be near you the light just radiates,

Megan x 

P.s. Nude dress in the future? I think SO.